Tag Archive: sabotage


My son suggested we go for a walk yesterday. He was kidding. I did go, though. That’s three days in a row so it’s looking like I’m getting back to normal again. Just have to say that after not walking for over a week, Thursday’s walk made me realize how quickly we lose what we don’t use. Ouch!

I started to take some photos and realized the batteries in the camera were dead. That problem is solved now so I’ll have to get out there today and take some. I could’ve said, “maybe I’ll get out there and take some,” but I’m learning that thoughts and words have a profound effect on the outcome of our lives. By simply changing “maybe” to “I’ll have to” I’ve set myself up for success because I’ve told myself I’m going to do it. My attitude is completely different.  Instead of thinking of my walk as optional I’m planning the best time to go.

I used to hate exercising, but now I love it and the workouts I do now are more challenging. If anything, you’d think I’d hate it even more, but I took Chalene Johnson’s advice and started telling myself I love it. There are times when the workouts feel especially tough. Instead of thinking, “I can’t do this today. I just don’t have the energy,” I tell myself I can do it and that I’m fine. It may sound crazy, but it works. And not just with exercise. We can change our perspective on anything by replacing negative thoughts with positive ones.

I’m realizing that I need to expand my ability to do this to other areas of my life. I’ve spent a lot of time thinking and talking about how I’m not organized or good at keeping the apartment clean because of my background. I’m not saying that those things weren’t true, but now I’m going to tell myself that I’m awesome at organizing and cleaning. Does that mean that suddenly everything will be perfect? No, but now instead of focussing on what I can’t do I’ll be looking for ways to be better.

In the past, I’ve had a pattern of starting things and then not finishing them. I think it’s fairly normal to not finish every single thing we start, but once I had given myself that label I became “the person who never finishes anything” which set me up for failure. Now I’m going to be “the person who follows through and finishes things.” No doubt the temptation will arise to quit things when they get hard, but now I know how to push through it. Instead of telling myself I might as well give up because that’s what I always do I can talk to myself the same way I would a friend who is tempted to quit something worthwhile.

The Golden Rule says treat others the way you want to be treated. I think there’s a flip side to that. Treat yourself the way you want other people to treat you. If a friend kept telling me I might as well give up because that’s what I always do or I can’t do something because I don’t have what it takes to succeed I would be seriously offended and probably wouldn’t be their friend very long. But that’s exactly the kind of stuff we tell ourselves on a regular basis. We need to learn to be our own biggest cheerleader and stop sabotaging ourselves. When the negative thoughts start to seep in and take over we have to make a conscious effort to fight them off. Thoughts are only as real as the actions we take because of them. If the thought crosses the mind of a successful person that they’re not successful does that make it true? Not unless they allow themselves to believe it and stop doing the things that have made them a success.

I dare you to try it. Identify something negative you continually tell yourself that keeps you from doing something you want or need to and start telling yourself the opposite. If you find yourself thinking it won’t work, you’re still doing it. Cut it out. Adjust your attitude so it’s positive. You CAN do this. Now I’m going to go for a walk, just like I said I would. 🙂

I weighed in this morning, not because I wanted to, but because it’s my day to do so and I have to stay accountable. I was up 3 lbs from last week. Hmm. Thinking about this logically, there’s no way I gained 3 lbs of fat, even with my latest indiscretions. Weight fluctuates constantly and I’ve been building muscle and half of what I ate the night before was probably still in my stomach (ewww) AND I’ve eaten about a month’s worth of sodium in the past week so at least part of it has to be water weight. Whatever. In the grand scheme of things it’s not that big of a deal…as long as it doesn’t continue.

I decided to do two shakes today hoping it would help with the crazy craving I’ve been having at night. My usual morning one gets me through just fine until late afternoon, but after dinner is when it all goes to….wherever. Only on “these” days, though. When I’m myself, I do just fine at night with a little help from my willpower. Anyway, the second shake definitely helped with the cravings. It was my own self-sabotaging tendencies that got me.

Pre-breakfast – 1 banana (needed something so my metabolism would kick into gear, but wasn’t ready to make my shake before my 7:30am non-“group” walk because the kids still weren’t up yet – and I still wasn’t going to wash the blender twice)

Breakfast – Chocolate Shakeology made with 8oz water, 4oz 1% organic milk, a little vanilla extract and a dash of cinnamon

AM Snack – P90X Chocolate Peanut Butter protein bar

Lunch – Greenberry Shakeology made with 10oz Stash mango passionfruit tea, 4oz mango puree from Trader Joe’s, 1 packet Truvia, 5 ice cubes, 1 scoop Shakeology Fiber Boost

PM Snack – 1 1/2c sliced cucumber, 1/4c hummus, 2 97% fat-free Hebrew National hot dogs, 2Tbs Simply Heinz ketchup (I don’t know why I can’t get this to go to the left, but I’m wasting time trying to figure it out)

Appetizer – my younger son set up a cafe on our deck while I took my older son to his basketball game and when we got home he had cheese and crackers set out for us (yes, it was 33 degrees, but I ate it out there anyway because I didn’t want him to think I didn’t appreciate it) 8 Saltine crackers, 1 wedge Weight Watchers spreadable Swiss cheese

Dinner – (which we picked up on the way home not knowing my son was making food for us) 1 Taco Bell 7-Layer burrito, 1 Taco Bell bean burrito

I was feeling totally fine and satisfied and then that thing kicked in where I started thinking about all the stuff I couldn’t have. This is why dieting fails. The more you try and restrict yourself, the more you obsess until you just give in. By the time I’d eaten the Taco Bell, I’d consumed about 2300 calories which would hardly be considered “dieting”. Normally, I would’ve been more than fine with that. But not this day. Oh no. I just had to have 3 more of those mini Peppermint Patties…dessert. Those 3 turned into 6 and then I stopped counting. I honestly have not idea what my final calorie count was so I’ll just show you what it would’ve been had I stopped after those first 3 Peppermint Patties. (Notice that other than walking, I’ve not mentioned a post-workout drink for a few days. That’s because I’ve not done ChaLEAN Extreme for three days. This has to stop immediately. I can feel myself being pulled back into that cycle and I’m going to fight it with everything I’ve got.)

Total calories through the 3 Peppermint Patties – 2437, Protein – 116 grams, Carbs – 379 grams, Fat – 63 grams, Fiber – 48 grams

Protein 18%, Carbs 59%, Fat 23%

Had I stopped there I would’ve actually had a deficit. Total calories burned – 2629.