Take the fact that I grew up in an angry, violent home environment and factor in my red hair which prompted many people over the years to make comments about the temper that I must have. What do you get? An angry redhead. The problem of controlling myself peaked as a teenager and only by the grace of God have I gotten it under control…for the most part. Every great once in a while something will push my buttons and it will be all I can do to refrain from acting upon what I’m feeling. Today was one of those days.

As I headed out to walk I passed two young men in the hallway who were going door to door selling magazines. If anyone is sympathetic it’s me because I’ve done door to door work before and it’s not easy. But today I was leaving my kids at home (no big surprise that they didn’t want to walk with me) with their dad who was getting some much needed sleep after a week of getting less than 5 hours a day. I asked them nicely if they could do me a favor and skip my door and explained why. One responded, “Sure, no problem. We’ll catch you when you come back.” Ok, that annoyed me. “That’s ok.” They laughed. (!) As I entered the elevator I felt the need to let them know I had purchased from their company before (which I had) and I didn’t want to again. The door slid shut and I wondered if they would respect my request.

I dialed my son’s cell phone to let him know not to answer the door if someone knocked. A few short minutes later I was on my way down the street, but couldn’t stop wondering if they had knocked. I called my son again and sure enough, they had…twice. I was steaming. It was so tempting to turn around and go back to confront them, but it was such a beautiful day and I knew if I went back I’d miss a small window of opportunity to take some nice photos. I settled on calling the office and left a message letting them know someone was soliciting in the buildings. I fumed for a few more minutes, but as I walked the anger started to melt away despite my best effort to hold onto it. There’s something about a good workout (especially Turbo Jam or TurboFire with all those punches and kicks) that dissipates negative feels. You may not forget the thing that was bothering you, but you’ve had a chance to work through it so you can handle it in the best way.

Ultimately, I’m glad I decided to keep walking and enjoy the weather instead of going back. Maybe they would’ve learned something if I had, but maybe not. I don’t think I was in the right frame of mind to be reasonable in a confrontation so I believe I made the best choice. Woe unto them if I happen to see them on the property again, though. 😉

Today was a rarity in this part of Oregon. Usually if there are clouds they’re completely covering the sky and everything is grey. Not today. Here’s what we got to enjoy, even if only for a few brief minutes.

“You define yourself by your decisions.” – Gary Ryan Blair 

Such a simple statement, but very profound. It took me years to figure it out, but I am not defined by the labels others have chosen for me or by the circumstances that surround me. Each and every decision defines who we are. We can choose to be what others expect us to be or we can choose to show them who we really are. No matter what the behavior is, we can find a way to avoid it if it needs to be or we can find the courage to follow through if the goal is worthwhile. Today I chose to be a lover of nature instead the angry lady on the 4th floor. Who will you choose to be?

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